Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
