first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
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