and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
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