history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
