it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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