fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize