Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
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