He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Randomize
