we have officially lost it.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
