Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
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