Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
