Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
