They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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