Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
