What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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