The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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