Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
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