I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Randomize
