We're facebook friends in real life
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
