I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
