My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
It was confusing and full of hummus
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Randomize
