i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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