I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Everclear isn't food dammit
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
