this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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