Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
