Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
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