I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Randomize
