you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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