the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
