i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
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