If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
