Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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