Texts From Last Night

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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  So how was he last night?

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Five-minute foot-long.

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  (508): So how was he last night? (617): Five-minute foot-long. http://tfl.nu/89p0
  Replies (29) Good night (852) Bad night (1476)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.

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  (270): I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you. http://tfl.nu/x17f
  Replies (7) Good night (2284) Bad night (787)
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.

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  (563): I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever. http://tfl.nu/ydd6
  Replies (20) Good night (1096) Bad night (4612)
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  (805): View more from California

  all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.

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  (805): all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl. http://tfl.nu/c5of
  Replies (14) Good night (945) Bad night (4095)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  Come see our sink grown plant.

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  (480): Come see our sink grown plant. http://tfl.nu/3v5r
  Replies (25) Good night (4364) Bad night (1291)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.

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  (612): Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore. http://tfl.nu/3jmh
  Replies (15) Good night (4509) Bad night (1384)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.

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  (519): It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band. http://tfl.nu/y1g3
  Replies (18) Good night (1128) Bad night (5309)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.

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  (727): there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning. http://tfl.nu/6rsw
  Replies (17) Good night (3977) Bad night (1933)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..

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  (503): I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions.. http://tfl.nu/v6no
  Replies (2) Good night (1940) Bad night (1135)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.

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  (651): You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions. http://tfl.nu/alli
  Replies (8) Good night (1943) Bad night (754)
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  (516): View more from New York

  Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.

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  (516): Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper. http://tfl.nu/eehy
  Replies (8) Good night (1822) Bad night (593)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.

  (682): View more from Texas

  Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.

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  (210): Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that. (682): Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude. http://tfl.nu/g9al
  Replies (2) Good night (698) Bad night (1022)
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  (808): View more from Hawaii

  Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.

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  (808): Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned. http://tfl.nu/vl4n
  Replies (3) Good night (469) Bad night (380)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.

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  (814): Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good. http://tfl.nu/cttc
  Replies (1) Good night (659) Bad night (329)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.

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  (203): So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza. http://tfl.nu/aaw9
  Replies (1) Good night (777) Bad night (304)

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