She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Damn victory sex feels great
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
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