I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
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