You just made me feel so damn special
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
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But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
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i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
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