I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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