people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Randomize
