Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Randomize
