She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
