Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
i think i have two assholes
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
