i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
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