marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
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