I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
bring money and cleavage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize