as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
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