Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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