Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
