In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
