Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
