I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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