pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
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